(continuing from last time…)

Fortunately, Jesus did not leave me there this time. I still wondered what it meant to “do what is true,” or to “practice the truth.” He began by showing me what it does not mean.

It certainly does not mean to keep the all the law, otherwise Jesus would not have come, “the world might be saved through him.”(John 3:17)

He led me to 1 John chapter 1, verses 8 and 10. The one who comes to the truth is not the one who does do not sin –
“If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.” (1 John 1:8)
“If we say we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us.” (1 John 1:10)

Clearly the one who comes to the light is not someone who feels they have not sinned. John sandwiches the what the truth is in between:
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:9)

The one who comes to the truth is the one who confesses their sin. There was hope.

But John continues into chapter 2, “And by this we know that we have come to know him, if we keep his commandments… Whoever says “I know him” but does not keep his commandments is a liar and the truth is not in him…” (1 John 2:1-2)

How do I stay hopeful and not leave condemned because I do not keep his commandments? I recognized that God is not contradicting himself. The truth is neither in the one, “who says he has no sin,” nor the one who, “does not keep his commandments.” The one who keeps His commandments is also the one who confesses their sin. And the one who keeps his commandments is the one empowered by the same Spirit that enabled Christ to actually keep his Father’s commandments perfectly.

Again, Christ calmed my fears and offers hope.
Christ saves me only because I confess my sin and believe in his offer to save me.
Christ delivers me from despondency by calling me to confess my sin always.
Christ alleviates my fears about future failure through the promise of his Spirit.

“For God has not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love and of a sound mind.”(2 Tim. 1:7) “For you have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons” (Romans 8:15)

Thankfully Christ did not leave me without hope that evening. And I hope to trust that his word is not meant to leave me despairing, but to look and reason until I see the truth next time I am tempted to walk away hopeless.